[1. I Love You][2. The Beast][3. What They Think][4. What Happens]
[5. Alive][6. He Lived][7. Dragon][8. Truth][9. Enemy]
[10. Problem Solution][11. Minimize][12. Chaos Love][13. Things]

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~~I LOVE YOU~~

struck down, dumb,mute
not ignorant just incapable 
I look up at your sweet face
and it's all I can do to breathe
I'd love to tell you how I feel
But I can't it's locked in tight
If I could open my mind, I'd show it to you
All of these feelings all day and all night
All of these wonderful things that you do to me
My mind is surrounded by the beauty of you
I want to scream it out tell all of the world
But how can I say everything all at once
How can you say, when the words they won't work
When one hasn't been made to fill up that void
I'll try to tell you every time that we talk
I will try to describe it when ever I write
My heart it screams to try and come out
I pray every second that I do this right
A love so precious that I can't describe
I'll cling and I'll cuddle, and by God I'd fight
I will not let go of this wonderful soul
That warms me and heals me and loves me right back
This beautiful Lady that holds what I am
She sees me and loves me, maybe sometimes for what I am not
She has me, she has me, in the palm of her hand  
I know that she loves me for all that I am
I live in her love, every breath I breathe is hers
My weak old heart every furious beat is hers to enjoy
I hope she knows when she reads this I'd tell her, I would
If only there were words that were made, words that would do
Until I find a word that will say what I'd say
Every moment I can, I'll say I love you
And hope that with the pounding of my heart
And the with the breathes that you steal
That you know, that I do
I Love you, I Love You, I LOVE YOU
MJMansfield
6-26-11
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~~THE BEAST~~

as the boy holds his hands to him
reaching for a soul he knows he no longer has
as much as he wants to feel love
only rage...
an unholy site growing in the street
An unholy beast
growing from a man
Cut down in the nite
He reaches out in the gray morn
A new beast
with inhuman might
the Beast grins from behind blodshot eyes
only proud that it rained so the tears don't show
A beast so filled with rage
he grows
A beast a mage
he grows
his back ripples
the flimsy Flannel tears
The newly grown fur bristles
A smile that says beware
A strange new breed
of heartless beast
A new king indeed
intent upon a feast
His wild wild eyes searching searching yet knowing he'll never find
he growls and grins
a shame to feast upon mankind
but for now with no angel brave enough to dare
and no...all demons back away sure of his wares
he walks, he feasts and returns the pain
The beast the beast quite insane
The ripping sound his steel claws make
an evil thirst that won't be slaked
Tasting touching
Robbing stealing
all he is he never was
A thief, a thief of life he is
cold dark thoughts cloud his brain
he laughs and grins
satisfaction in his pain
he will not, cannot let it go
for it is all he knows

The certain death of his all
yet he heeds natures call
quickly thru the streets he'll Rage
fearing none at all
knowing no man
no beast or no cage
can stop this maul
He cries he grins
He was his only sin
He cries and grins
the world has let him in
He cries and grins
By: MJMansfield
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~~~What They Think~~~

So I sat there a minute 
wiped the blood off of my face 
Stood up and smiled at them 
They thought I was finished that was just a taste
Grinning like a mad man 
Completely at peace 
All of what they knew 
it really was the least
My passions confuse them 
they think it just love or hate 
I am so much more 
They will all find out about a minute too late
pigeon holed and ignored... 
I am or I am not 
completely misjudged 
My ice cold blood boils hot
Yes a poor boy was i 
What confused souls they will have 
when the man emerges 
And they see fury that is not mad
how their lives are about to change 
and it's all in my soft smile 
everything they think they are 
is over in just a little while
MJMansfield 
7-9-11
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~~~What Happens~~~
what happens when being me is not enough...when I look in the mirror
 and see nothing there...when I scream out in the night only to hear 
windows shut..what happens when I am no longer me...when the roles I 
play are bigger than the boy playing them...what happens when the boy 
no longer can stand for the sentence…. does he get held in comtempt...
what happens then....as the days go by what if they do not add, but, 
take away from all that I am..what happens then...what happens....
7-8-11
MJMansfield
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~~~ALIVE~~~
Flames from hell rise up and fall from the sky 
He LIVES AGAIN.... 
Flying wild free and high 
HE LIVES AGAIN 
He's so pure that he must be a lie 
Demon grins 
He's the one that made the good girls lie 
The boy is sin
Falling out of the sky 
He is so damn ALIVE 
Lok at the vengeance gleaming in his eye 
He is so Alive
Look at the fire that surrounds all that he does 
He must be a demon 
Look at the fire that is in al of his loves 
He must be deceiving 
This Demon smiles and he tells you the truth 
What an angel he is 
This Demons wings are golden and smooth 
What an angel he is
Flames from the depths rise up in him 
He's ALIVE 
The call of the wild, the free, he is what he seems 
He's ALIVE 
MJmansfield 
7-9-11
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~~~He Lived~~~
oh the boy had lived 
he had done and conquered 
He had lived 
He had fought and lost with style

Oh the boy had lived 
He had traveled and seen 
He had lived 
But he wasn't all he could be

Oh the boy had lived 
Until the day he met his girl 
He had lived 
But he had never been alive with the fire

The boy woke up 
That fateful day when his skin crawled with excitement 
He started live 
Once she opened up to him

The boy became alive 
Once she allowed him to love her 
He is ALIVE 
Now that he has her love

Oh yes he is alive 
In her beautiful love 
He is alive 
She and he hand in hand

oh yes he is alive 
when he sees the sparkle in her dark eyes 
He is so alive 
In every smile she gives

Oh he once lived 
But now all of him is alive 
He lived 
But now passion and love twist together

Oh yes he is alive 
Kissing her cheek so soft 
He is alive 
And love is better than he ever thought

Yes so alive 
in every single thought 
So alive 
Breathing in her love

Yes he lived before 
But now he is alive 
He lived 
But now, finally a reason to thrive... 
MJMansfield 7-11-11 
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~~~DRAGON~~~
The Dragon rolls slowly out of the water 
His old head shaggy from under water growth
His feet touch the ground a bit unsure after all this time
His heart beating fast as he rises to renew old oaths

He has returned to the land of his children 
Longing to find a mate after all these years
He shakes and bellows and smiles
Loves call stronger than the eon’s fears

His nostrils fill with air and his bellows clear
The fire inside starts anew like a yearling learning all over
his eyes clearing from the watery grave
his toes burying deep in the fields of clover

slowly he smiles as the first tendrils of smoke start to seep from his jaws
His ancient teeth gleaming white and deadly in the summer sun
the smoke curls surrounding his face like a devils halo
He laughs as only a dragon can signaling soon there will be had fun
MJmansfield
7-15-11
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~~~TRUTH~~~
Truth is a bitter fuckin pill 
Best taken with a chilled margarita 
And a healthy dose of fuck you 
This is my version of a pura vida

Chopped up and snorted off of a hookers ass. 
That's my version of the bible 
Cold gin shots for breakfast 
I stagger home because I am able

My truth is a wicked bitch 
Curled up and lying in wait 
She's a sexy little girl 
All full of passion and hate

Diggin’ in my cold flesh 
Like a grave robber in the night 
Truth is a nasty girl 
Who likes to claw and bite 

My truth is a fiend and a friend 
A broken, battered, weathered man 
With eyes of glass and heart of steel 
Cursed with loving gentle hands

MJMansfield
7-18-11
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~~~Enemy~~~

Spent a life time powering through
No matter what the situation
Sadness or pain Love would do
Never worried about confrontations

Never met a wall I couldn’t ram with my head
Nor a friend that I couldn’t stand with
Sleep was a joke only for the dead
Always laughing under my breath

Time was the only barrier I couldn’t cross
That cold hard bastard waited me out
Now by the hour I can count a new loss
Nothing can stop it no matter how I shout

Never before had I been too weak
Never would have to say that I quit
Though still loud and far from meek
Not quite sure how a weak strong man fits

All of my life I overcame 
Now just time has caged me in
Never stopped just because of pain
But the loss of strength and will is my newest sin

I stand as tall as I might
Tears run down my grinning face
Not sure about this new fight
But I don’t really care about how deaths gonna taste

Too damn strong to just give in
I’ll rally against this last enemy
I doubt I will last, probably won’t win
I won’t quit I’ll go, I’ll go till there’s nothing left of me
MJMansfield
8-22-11
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~Problem Solution~
I Am The Problem And The Solution I Am Love
Only in this moment
right now
either my presence or my absence makes the difference
this is the when and the how
I am who I said I was
I am Love
I am that fickle ghost
the one that haunts your day and your night
I am Love
I am who I said I was
I am the angel you fear
shining light upon your sweet face my dear
I am exactly who you thought I was
even when I do not act as you expected
I am a warrior with a soft tongue and a vicious stroke of my own
I am exactly what you were billed for
all of the hidden extra's were in plain sight
I am that sweet guiding light that leads to the path of enlightenment
and also rides with you on the highway to hell
My razor sharp claws are velvet lined
luxuriously comfortable deaths await you
cradling you in my soft deadly desires
sins of flesh and mind that sing of heavenly heights
and sweet devilish lows
I am...exactly what you wanted
more to the point I was what you needed
I am...exactly....what I said I was... 
MJMansfield 
8-29-11
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~minimize~

Not really a big deal just a thought I had
Everyone asks me what I think until I start to talk
a tribute to myself a game of chance it seems..
after all I did…I still do… and onward I walk

So many things in my narrow brain
Feeling selfish and rightly so
This new call of dead gone by
Time for me, and time to go

some people deserve to be alone
though they scratch and claw their way into the social scene
they cling to others with all their might
We are everything that we seem

arrogantly shallow, warped and obscene
deserving to be minimized and brought before the judge
they scream and yell and talk the fight
my very being the fathers blotted writ, a holy smudge

MJMansfield
8-24-11 
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~Chaos Love~
So here I am again
a man who loves, a boy who fights
standing in the rain
and a spirit living on the edge of a knife

wondering which way to go from here
knowing the way for me is never clear
only surviving the fight
not fighting to survive

the pattern of my love is chaos
a strict pattern of nothing
The symmetry of the way it goes
pretty sure it doesn’t mean anything

MJMansfield
8-14-2011 
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~Things~
there are things I am
and things I am not
things I will never be
and things I never want to be

For all that I am, I am Love
I am full of fire and venom
The Eagle flying like a dove
swords and shields battle worn

I am everything and nothing
So happy not to matter
Thru the wasting and the wanting
The dreams have been splattered

while my soul ran for cover
My body aching to take the brunt
I kept my eyes open till it was over
your blade opening my heart like a shunt

No matter what the pain
Loving Till the bitter end
Driving in the pouring rain
Never turn blast through the bend

encounters full of passions raised
when we meet our souls entwined
with days so long and time so short  
fingers claw at flesh like vines

MJMansfield
8-16-11
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